Let's just look at the writing/communicating pressure I'm feeling at the moment. We have a total of (wait... I have to add them up...)
- the ensfamily.org blog for our family missions-related posts
- our general newsletter that we used to send out every 6-8 weeks and hasn't gone out for over 3 months now (writer's block and procrastination anyone???)
- our prayer update emails for people who want more info and are willing to pray for us (or at least want to know what we are asking for prayer for)
- and this blog for my just plain "Melissa in a t-shirt, jeans and a pony tail with a baseball cap on" posts
OK, so that's 4 different places to update - not counting facebook and twitter (yes... I just started a twitter account or whatever you call it. I don't know why. My curiosity got the best of me finally) for photos and spur of the moment quick updates.
Is it any wonder that I have sort of gone into deer-in-the-headlights mode when it comes to communicating? The tagline on my blog here used to be something about being a girl who thinks way too much and this is one of those things that I'm probably making too hard. I guess it comes from the oddness of going from being just another member of the church to a missionary. Sometimes I don't know which Melissa to be. Melissa the Mom or Melissa the Missionary? I know it's supposed to be the same, but in my head it feels like this:
At our ladies prayer groups back in Fresno I could show up in the t-shirt, jeans and baseball cap I mentioned earlier and spill my tears about how I was struggling with packing and moving or saying goodbye or whatever. It was where I shared the more vulnerable parts of my heart with women who knew me very well and loved me - I think even more because they knew me so well. Because they were so amazing like that. I sort of feel like writing on this blog here is like sharing there.
|At the beach recently...|
|Back in Kansas in Fall last year|
Anyone out there will have some advice for me? Should I just post this over on the other blog and start showing up there in jeans and flip flops because that's where I am right now? Thanks for listening anyway.